rewritethepast: (lalalala)
I believe that I have done an infinitely stupid thing yet I have not been adequately punished for it. Thank the cosmos.

In my defense, I say that my brain was addled by simultaneously finalizing our research paper and studying for my Stat finals (and post-finals test).

In my rush to get to school (because I was unfortunately running late) for the test, I accidentally…

I don’t know why odd things always happen to me at the end of a grading period. )

***

I now have a new friend/stuffed toy/general oddity to keep me company as I sleep/write/procrastinate/study/watch anime/(insert other actions here).

My brother is amused by it because unlike most stuffed toys (which are generally animals), it is a…

G. A. S. P. )

***

It’s summer! (Or what little there is of it before it’s time to go back to the grade grind.) I am currently celebrating it by …

*crickets chirp*

Err.

I celebrate it by…

*looks embarrassed*

Having lots of guilt-free sleep marathons.

Well, and writing and writing, but that’s after I’ve woken up and eaten something (or right before I sleep).

***
For those who like Wicked (book or musical, preferably musical, or both), Youtube, and the Sims: hopefully not mutually exclusive groups. )

Seeing videos like these make me realize how much one can do with one computer game (and a lot of expansions and customized stuff).

In other The Sims related news, there is apparently going to be a Sims movie (info taken from here). *gasp* I wonder what kind of plot it would have…

***

The most epic Pokemon battle of all time!!!!

Rated PG-13 for multiple swearing, a cellphone, the lack of a Hyper Beam TM, and Ditto appearances. :)

I think my brain exploded from the battle. >_< But now I want to do something like that with my Pokemon game…

***

Belated happy birthday to Hopia-san, Danni, and Patrick :)

***

Is that what you’ve learned in your Science intensive course other than the difference between basalt and granite and the stages of ecological succession? )

***

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-847403360680458951&hl=en

Topless sandals?????

Picture and description taken from the website:

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Topless sandals simulate walking barefoot while protecting your feet. Topless sandals stick to the bottom of your feet, but leave no residue on your feet when you take them off. The "stick" is guaranteed for a year, which is the typical life span of a flip flop. Topless sandals are basically topless flip flops, but so much cooler. You'll be amazed at how many heads you turn while wearing your topless sandals. People will literally think you are barefoot and so will your feet. Topless-Sandal.com is the official topless sandals store and topless sandals accessories store for items such as toe rings, foot jewelry, and anklet bracelets. Tell your family and friends about the hottest item on the Internet - the topless sandal. Our topless sandals make great stocking stuffers at low prices. Topless sandals are just plain fun and feel great on your feet. Go Topless!

And allegedly (according to an email I got today) these are available at the Ateneo Mall.

***

For those wondering why there is hardly anything relating to my real life here…

Sometimes real life is just too painful to write about.




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rewritethepast: (resignation)
You know you need a break from life in general when you wake up in the morning, take a bath, and suddenly realize that you're about to put deodorant on your toothpaste.

Not like I can take one anytime soon, though.

***

The length of my lj entries is inversely proportional to the frequency of my posting them. )

***

Congratulations to Kim and Miggy for winning the Qwizardy (sp?) contest!

And a note to all of us: Starbucks was not founded by Mr. Star or Mr. Bucks. Just like the Johari window was not conceptualized by Mr. Johari.

***

Donk moment of the... wait, I think I have too many donk moments, period. )

***

Do you remember the day we cut class because we saw a hamster at the front lobby? )

***

[I’m really sorry this is late, Vinni-san; writing (rather, attempting to write) about hydrates and oxy-red reactions used up all my words.]

To my friend the demon warrior who beheaded me, hee. )

***

And the Coke and the beer stay untouched side by side, blending into the table and into the shadows and disappear from my sight. )

***

Sometimes love has to take a backseat to everything else, you know.

That time is now, but it won’t be for evermore.

Although it is nice to think that my last cry was induced not by angst but by prolonged aerial exposure to formalin.

But I can’t keep on running away forever, and I’m just waiting for the time when my path runs out and I slam into a brick wall.

***

And you try again, and I am reminded why I hate instant messengers. Honestly, the first time I use it in a long time (for schoolwork, no less) and you put me off it again with your deceiving messages sent at the wrong time and the wrong place. Then again, every time is the wrong time and everywhere we’re not face-to-face is the wrong place.

Am I cruel for not replying? I guess I am. Propriety demands that I at least reply to your message, no matter how distasteful, without feeling, and how fake it is. Then I remember what happened the last time (and please make it the last time) I followed propriety and I think I made the right decision.

Your words, I’ve heard them before. Tell me something new this time, or at least change the words. I’m sure you’re competent enough to check an online thesaurus.

I repeat, I repeat, and I repeat myself again: I’m not that kind. I’m not that naïve. I’m not that trusting anymore. If you’re going to try at all, put some more effort in it at least. And I'm not about to jeopardize my chance at contentment just to give you 'peace of mind.'

***

Okay. In light of it being Martin Luther King Day two weeks ago, I found out that Mr. King was murdered in Lorraine Hotel. (Thankfully it has been demolished.)

My birthname becomes more and more auspicious. *rolls eyes*

***

Nevertheless, I am still trying to be happy now. )

***

Poison makes me sleepy.

I stay in the back, though, so I can sleep to my heart’s content. (Unless there’s a test, of course.) Sleep or write in my planner or even do the Math module. >_<

Of course, poison sometimes weakens with time. Other times, it gets stronger, somehow evolves into a more destructive and virulent form of itself, because it was left to survive how many years.

In our case… it’s probably the latter.

***
Imagine a perfectly healthy frog, valiantly trying to hop away into the wilderness that is UP Manila, being held down by three or four girls with a male skinning its hind leg. )





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rewritethepast: (determined)
On Tuesday, I committed school-sanctioned murder.

The murder weapon? Formalin.

My partner-in-crime? Joan.

And death only came to our victim after we forcibly disintegrated its brain and spinal cord (using a probe) and removed most of its skin cells. It tried weakly (unintentionally) to poison us when we cut off its cheeks (where the poison was stored/secreted) but it only got a bit of Joan’s cheek.

I know it’s normal, and it’s for science (and I did learn a lot from the experience), but for some reason I still feel sorry for the frog.

There was so much blood, gushing from the holes we made and falling down on the ground. And even as we skinned it, we saw its heart beat weakly and oh, its body is so cold.

And then it’s the end and we wash up our scalpels and scissors, pouring the diluted formalin in our glass jar and there you go in, frog, and that’s that. No more eleventh hour reprieve, no more last bids for freedom.

And on Tuesday, oh dear Tuesday, it’s your muscles next. (To my knowledge, that is.)

***

Is it sadistic to derive pleasure from causing an animal pain?

Because in some weird bizarre way I enjoyed skinning our frog, enjoyed snipping the fragile threads holding the epithelial skin cells to the muscles, enjoyed seeing its muscles in all their nakedness. (Of course, I did have a cold so I couldn’t smell it – my classmates all complained about the frog’s smell.) And while we relieved our frog of its largest organ, its heart kept beating, reminding us that our specimen was still alive. And I’d feel a pang of guilt for the frog and think and then Ma’am will remind us to continue skinning and I’d pick up the scalpel and scissors again and snip snip snip I go and more of the skin ends up on the board where the frog’s pinned to. (We drove pins through its erm, paws. We all thought of “Crucifixion,” except the hind feet weren’t pinned together but separated.)

I couldn’t really hold the frog while it was alive (alive and not paralyzed), but it seemed normal (and even natural) to hold it once it stopped being able to move.

Its muscles are fascinating. They were slippery and dark red and cold to the touch and when we removed the skin we tried not to cut them (and I think we succeeded, to a point). I kept thinking to myself, I’m holding a naked muscle (not encased by skin) that isn’t cooked in my hand, a muscle still attached to a living organism. It’s fascinating, from its surprisingly tough dark skin (hard to cut even with the sharp pairs of scissors included in our dissecting kits) to its very small thumbs (the indicator of whether a frog is male or female – I think ours was male since its thumbs were a bit swollen, but one of my classmates reckons he got a pregnant frog), to its cheeks which secrete a creamy yellow poison to its weakly beating heart. And we’ve only started observing it externally. Do you know how to remove the skin of a frog stuck to its feet? You pull it off like you would a glove (although it needs more pressure).

There’s a psychological thing here, but I’m missing it by a mile.

I wonder how I’ll feel when it’s cat-dissecting time. Wait, I think the cats will be killed before we dissect them. Maybe when it’s shark-dissecting time.

***

Why is it that nothing goes right?

Or maybe everything’s just wrong.

Same banana.

Or maybe not.

***

I blush when I think of it, although I think I shouldn’t.

But it’s like an entirely new feeling now, blushing like this. It’s not because of embarrassment, nor is it because I feel sick, but…

Maybe, just maybe, I’m feeling something for someone I haven’t known for a long time now.

Or maybe I’m still sick.

***

You know those times when you just want to curl up and sleep but you can’t because propriety demands you stay awake?

Danged propriety.

***

I’m still sick and I know I’m not getting better.

And you know something? It’s all your fault.


***

I honestly think life should have save points. You know, those areas in role-playing video games where one can save before embarking on a new adventure or continuing one. Imagine saving before tests, before confessing, before mouthing off to a teacher… Then you can reset to the last saved part of your life if you don’t like the results.

Then again, I’d probably end up saving every three minutes or so. So I’ll just hover around the save areas for the rest of my life. Donk.

***

I have a new friend. She’s (I think she’s female) terribly light and rather brittle, and she can accompany me to school in my backpack. I’m terribly interested in her (at least I need to be interested) and I know I’ll learn a lot from her.

And she only cost 60 pesos (thank you UP Manila for the price cut)! Hee, it’s weird having a frog skeleton on your bed.

***

Many people tell me to not listen to her, but it's like a knife in one's heart when she reminds you that you're not like other people, that you're not biologically perfect like them.

I shouldn't listen.

But I'm required to.

***

The Math Long Test I had earlier killed me.

But at least there were no swimming cockroaches (although when we left the campus Joan and Joanne encountered a lot of them on the street) nor rain (it rained the day before) nor denial of the right to use calculators.

Or something like that.

And now it's time to study for my two departmental exams tomorrow. Donk.

***

Belated happy birthday Nya :)

***

It’s you I still dream about.

And it’s you that keeps me wanting not to wake up anymore.
rewritethepast: (sad)
"You're sick," he says plainly and it's funny how the words my mother told me yesterday have such a different meaning when its his voice proclaiming them here where both of us are alone, no one else the wiser that we are meeting here. It's an echo, maybe, it's echoing in my mind and soothing the pain deep inside a little. Maybe I'm the only one who hears differently, my brain functioning hazily because of the growing pain I feel and the emotions that flutter around me - reminding him of what he is, what he was and still is to me.

I look at him disbelievingly, yet my cold hand grazes my forehead in a futile attempt to quiet the pounding deep inside it. "But I need to go to school later! I have to go to Ward 1 and IPC later to submit my genograph/gram!"

He looks at me imperiously, those brown eyes of his flickering to the hand on my forehead. "Forget it. You're sick, Lorraine. Go to bed already."

And I keep my hand pressed to my forehead, trying to ignore the overwhelming weakness in my muscles and the pain in my chest, my head, my stomach, my arms, my heart.

***

What a perfect New Year. I am downed by my old nemesis which killed me around mid-January, making me attend only Physics on a Monday (I think). Perfect. Just a little early. Complete with all the hazy hallucinations and waking dreams.

Oh fudgemuffins, make the pain stop. It hurts too much; I can't even walk anymore. Even typing this is a pain.

My mom says this is probably the flu. Fudgemuffins.

Good day, and I hope your new year is much better than mine.
rewritethepast: (resignation)
Have you ever woken up, thinking there was no point to waking up? That waking up would just make you face everything you've run away from, all those things you wish just didn't exist?

I've been waking up and thinking that for a long while now.

Regardless, even if I'm scandalously late (and my phone is missing yet again, hiding beneath my bed for unknown reasons!), Meri Kurisumasu, Maligayang Pasko, Merry Christmas. :)

***

This Christmas I received seven bags. :) I like bags.

But of course Christmas means something else, which is the mutilation of my French first first name. Gah. You know it's bad when it's the relative you see the most that massacres your name beyond recognition (only one r, i before a, etc.) and the relatives you forgot you had spell your name perfectly.

Eighteen Christmases have shown me one thing: no matter how easy it is supposedly to pronounce one's name (on record, only one person has mispronounced my first first name, and that's my English teacher in 2nd year), it is only too easy to misspell it.

Still, it was an interesting Christmas. Thanks to everyone that texted me :) I would have texted but my phone is still hiding under the bed. >_<

***

My family decided to eat at Makati Shang for Christmas dinner.

Hee, who should be at a nearby table but Zsa Zsa Padilla and Dolphy. I didn't recognize any of the other people they were with though.

That takes care of my Celebrity Sighting quota for the year. :)

***

Hey Block 13, you know that book we're supposed to read for Humanidades 1? "Ang Daigdig ng Tao?"

Its author just passed away a few days ago this year. :(

***

It's never been an option to admit I love you, you know.

Believe me, I've tried. I've tried and tried and looked for all the opportunities to do so, even making plans for them when they wouldn't come into my life.

It's first year all over again and I'm answering a long test in Integrated Science, scribbling down answers on a piece of intermediate pad paper rapidly since I studied hard and know all the answers. I write and write and suddenly you stand up and submit your paper and all the names and scientific information in my mind disappears in an instant and my heart beats faster and nothing is left but my thinking about you, you, and only you and soon the bell rings and my paper's only half finished and I leave the classroom in a daze.

All those years and I wait, wait and wait, and still nothing comes to pass. Then it's all gone wrong and it's you and me under one of those large trees and it's your voice I remember from that night, your firm voice telling me it's all just a game, a game and my heart cracks and it's all lost and you turn away like a gentleman does so I can cry without being shamed, with only the tree and the rain as my witnesses. Yet you're still there, just a foot away, and I want to speak but my voice has gone raspy and tears are the only thing I can express coherently.

It's all a game for you.

I wish you'd realize it never was.

Maybe, maybe everything now is because of you. Maybe my insomnia, my nonexistent attention span, my pale face and wish to run away from everything is because of this uncertainty that has always surrounded us, cloaked us and made what could be into what never was.

And now I sleep and sleep, hoping never to wake up, never to see the sunlight filter into my room past the venetian blinds. Let me stay in my dreams, Sandman, don't bring me back into this waking world. Please. Because I know what will be the thought in my mind when I wake up, when I wipe the tears from my eyes and touch my damp pillow and bring it out to dry.

I'll never be able to say it now.

***

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.

I can't wait. :)

Wow, the series I started reading in grade 5 is about to get finished soon. I think I'm going to feel what I felt when I finished Book 13 of Series of Unfortunate Events, only on a much larger scale because HP... for some days, it was all I had to think about positively.

***

It's apparently illegal and immoral to sell one's kidney.

According to the Department of Health, at least.

***

The Letter Meme, where Jar-san gave me the letter O. Gah. )

Okay, this was hard. Gaah.

***

Why is it that relatives never get clothes sizes right? You gain weight or maintain it and they give you stuff that won't fit a toddler. You lose weight and they give you stuff that'd fit a sumo wrestler. >_<

***

My brother wants to buy a Magic Sing. Help!






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rewritethepast: (resignation)
It's been more than a week and I come back to find my lj world turned upside down. So many quizzes/memes (like that Tarot Cart quiz which was uber-popular), so many outpourings from peoples' minds to read, to absorb, to try to understand. Sometimes I come away from an entry nodding my head, it's like someone stole the words right out of my head. Other times I end up shaking my head, lost at the prose my friend has written. Have I really been away so long? I don't think so. Maybe the world, this world with all my lj friends is moving too fast, and how can a simple child like me understand it using the middle as the start and the beginning as the end? It's not natural.

It's like I'm trapped in a time warp, thinking and dreaming and thinking and dreaming the same thoughts and the same dreams over and over again, and my lj friends' entries are the only things that prove to me that this time warp exists only for me.

It's been a hard week. Hard is actually too vague even for my tastes. It was exhausting, draining, and all my resources (financial, mental, physical, humoral, emotional, and otherwise) are gone, depleted, flushed down the toilet bowl. And with all these that happen, everything is magnified and made so much worse in the dreams that visit me while my head rests on my faithful cotton-covered pillow. Vivid images come in the night, sweet and gruesome come together in the Sandman's visit and I wake up disoriented, my heart pounding, my breathing forced. And these images stay embedded on my eyelids for all of the new day, and whether I'm closing my eyes in tiredness in Chem lab or blinking in dismay in Kom III I see them, just an eyelid away.

And I am undone again, again and again and again.

While my chosen overloaded life full of stairs and blue books is very stressful, it's never stopped me from posting before. Even now I could have typed something earlier but...

It's hard to just sit down and type, type, type. I feel like someone's looking over my shoulder as I press my fingers on the keyboard keys in a seemingly random manner, and I keep looking over my right shoulder to see if anyone's staring at me from my bed. I'm normally not a paranoid person, but...

Right now, I am one.

***

I missed some memes. Bah. Let's place them here and I dunno, keep them presented here forever for posterity. Donk.

The Tarot Card thing. )

Hmmm, interesting. And I've always liked this card :)

Not to mention that no one else's gotten this result yet :)

ganked from most everyone on my friendslist :)

01. Pick your birth month.
02. Strike out anything that doesn't apply to you.
03. Bold the five-ten that best apply to you.
04. Copy to your own journal, with all twelve months under an LJ-cut

APRIL: Active and dynamic. Decisive and hasty but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people's problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Emotional. Aggressive. Hasty. Good memory. Moving. Motivates oneself and others. Sickness usually of the head and chest. (At sa marami pang parte ng katawan.) Sexy in a way that only their lover can see.

The other months. )

Puro strikethrough ata 'to ah. >_< Mas malapit pa nga yung sa mga ibang month eh. :(

Wala pa atang gumagawa ng April eh :)

***

Let me just say what many people have said already:

Vitriol is a poison.

It's a very bad poison that disfigured Two Face (of DC comics). "Vitriol" throwing is very common in certain detective/mystery novels of a certain era.

No matter what form it is, I don't like it. It is commonly known now as sulfuric acid.

And to end my little educational lesson, I shall share this rhyme from the US:
Little Johnny took a drink, but he shall drink no more.
For what he thought was H2O was H2SO4.


(Mostly taken from here.)

***

It's funny. UP is known for freedom and all that, especially regarding what it teaches its students. (I refer to you PanPil people who had to bring porn to class especially, our Kom I class which had many "descriptive passages", and my Humanidades 1 class which makes us very familiar with gay/lesbian lit.)

Let me share the funniest bit of censorship Intarmed 2013 (and some non-block people) encountered yesterday.

We had to watch Pocahontas 2 for SocSci 1 yesterday. Our teacher didn't show up, but we still watched the movie. (And I have no idea why we watched Pocahontas 2 first instead of Pocahontas 1. Maybe the first one is more important. Anyway we'll watch the first next Tuesday.)

I will reveal the ending of Pocahontas 2. Gasp. And the censorship. Don't read if you don't want to be spoiled. )

***

Belated happy birthday Jman-san :)

***

I said earlier that my life seems to be trapped in a time warp.

Apparently my phone came along for the ride. >_<

***

(Thank you Wikipedia for the pictures.)

Okay, this is for someone who asked me:
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
This is Igglybuff, the preevolution of Jigglypuff.

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
This is Cleffa, the preevolution of Clefairy.

Both are pink baby pokemon. Both are normal type.

And they're both cute, I think :)

***

Do you guys remember the pass the message part of the Pisay 4th year retreat?

We did something like that for Kom III. First, the class was divided into three groups. There was a story (yes, a story, not just a statement) given to two people of each group. Since the story was in English, they would have to translate it and one of them would give the pertinent details (translated) to the next person in the group. And that person would pass it on and so on until it reaches the last person in the group. The last person would tell the story to the class.

For posterity's sake, I shall place the pertinent details of the story: (Please correct me if I missed something/typed something wrong.) // (Thanks Joan-san :))
"Marahil na alam ninyo ang tungkol sa kultong Dakobor. Itong kulto ay galing sa Russia ngunit pumunta itong Kanlurang Canada sa katapusan ng 17th siglo. Itong kulto ay kontrobersyal sapagkat sa tagsibol ay hinuhubad nila ang kanilang mga

Isang maaaliwalas na araw ng tagsibol, may isang batang pumuntang palengke na hubad. Nakita ng isang pulis ang batang iyon at gusto niya itong hulihin. Hinabol ng pulis ang bata ngunit hindi niya ito maabutan. Naisipan ng pulis na tanggalin ang kanyang dyaket (at t-shirt) ngunit nung ginawa niya ito ay hindi niya pa rin mahuli yung bata. Naisipan naman niya tanggalin ang kanyang sapatos ngunit wala rin itong napala. Tinanggal rin niya ang kanyang pantalon ngunit hindi pa rin niya nahuli ang bata kaya tinanggal na niya rin ang iba pa niyang panamit. Nahuli niya rin ang bata pagkatapos ngunit lahat ng manonood ay hindi alam kung sino yung pulis at sino yung bata."

Yes, I know the story is weird. I guess the policeman (or policewoman) must be inordinately small or the child must be inordinately tall for this to happen. Or something.

Now this is a very complicated story but passing it became horror because my groupmate accidentally changed the cult's name (Dakobor) to Baccara/Bakara/Bacarra. Donk.

Still, it was fun. Baccara. Gah. That name (and Dakobor) will forever be embedded in my mind.

***

I've been asking this of a lot of Intarmed students since we got the assignment to search for the lyrics of Colors of the Wind (from Pocahontas).

What the heck is a "blue corn moon?" Is it a blue moon made of corn? Or is it a blue moon that comes during the corn's harvest time?

Or is my trying to find logic (and astronomical continuity) in a children's song futile? XP

***

Pauline-san, was the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade cool? I heard they had a new Pikachu balloon :)

***

I'd like to type more but I think this is long enough for now.

I just hope that with the two days of rest that follow, I can visit dreamland without you, you with that mocking face of yours, walking beside me.
rewritethepast: (determined)
Excerpt from The Beatrice Letters:

"I will love you as a shingle loves falling off a house on a windy day and striking a grumpy person across the chin, and as an oven loves malfunctioning in the middle of roasting a turkey."

And from Book 13:

"'I told you,' Count Olaf said weakly, 'I told you I'd do that one last time.'"

Talk about love, Series of Unfortunate Events style. Witty and weird and doomed and gaaaah.

I finally finished Book 13.

I don't know what to say.

I've been following the series for a long time, but I didn't expect it to end this way. The whole book seemed different from the rest. It was an anticlimax to the drama of Book 12. It was just plain weird.

I'm not sad. I'm not sad. I'm not sad.

I'm confused, but I don't know what exactly makes me confused. Many things were revealed. Others were left unexplained. The ending. Shoot.

13 books. One Unauthorized Biography. One compilation of letters.

Donk.

I don't want to spoil anything, so I'll just say this:
There are sheep in Book 13. >_<

***

Thank you Trebor-san for yesterday, especially letting me taste my namesake cake :)

It was really fun, the food was good, and we got to talk a lot :) :)

Enjoy Book 13 :) I hope it makes up for the horror of Math tests on your actual birthday :)

***

Ok, I want to do that survey that became popular around a week back. Jar-san, I sense you started this one ;)

Meme/Survey time )

***

Hmmm. Apparently there is a nudist camp named PSHS. >_<

You learn something new everyday. O.o

***

Since I haven't posted anything related to Pokemon in a while, here's a picture of the pre-evolution of Chansey, Pinpuku (don't know if they'll change the name for Diamond/Pearl's US release).

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Thank you Wikipedia.

It is not holding an egg. That is a stone. >_< It's just trying to mimic Chansey who has an egg in its pouch.

Cute, though. :)

***

Yay, exempted ako sa NatSci 2 exam! :) :) :)

***

November 13 = start of classes. Hmmm.

Never mind that, let's finish all the requirements for this semester first =P

***

I want to be happy. I'm trying to be happy.

But I'd rather be miserable if you're happy.
rewritethepast: (resignation)
I haven't posted in a week. >_< I've sunk to new lows. Still now, I'm not finished with a lot of things I need to do. Ah well. I've been thinking too much again. I wish that I could turn off my brain sometimes. But with my luck, I'd probably just forget to turn it on again. >_<

Note: Different people were involved in all parts of the story. Well, actually the people in the first two parts are the same, but they are different distinct people compared to those in the third and fourth part.

Intro: This is a true story, yet some details are omitted or made unclear for the safety of certain people, most of all me. :) This story is more understandable if you've actually been reading my lj for at least eight months (basically, while I was in Pisay). (Haha, that's long.) Still, I tried to make it reference-free for those who aren't used to my writing style yet.

And you know, I'm still not done with you, Homecoming. There's still another story to write, which will probably appear after my 3rd Departmental Exam in Math on Thursday. :)

An Alumni Homecoming Story in Four Parts )

Note (added September 12, 2006): Obviously the person referred to in Parts 1 and 2 is not the same as the person referred to in Parts 3 and 4. Or if they are, I think I may have written a mistake in somewhere. *donk* I believe the person's identity in Parts 3 and 4 is obvious due to a number of key statements. However, it's the person's identity in Parts 1 and 2 that's the same as number 51 in my second contest :)

***

I'm glad I saw Jhud-san and Jar-san at Homecoming :) Although I was shocked by their physical appearance at first. Arvin-san also looks different. Ok, a lot of guys basically got hairier. >_< (As compared to Intarmed males who visit the barber at least once a month?) Still nice to see known people other than those in Intarmed again that are in my age range. :)

I'm glad I got to see a lot of people, although most of them were Lithium. (This was inevitable because apparently they were all attracted - by some sort of chemical/magnetic bond- to the Lithium Intarmed people.) I'm glad I got to see my anime-loving buddies too :)

Hmmm. I got accused of having footbinding done on my feet a lot that night (the lily feet). O.o I know I'm Chinese, but we're not that traditional... And I think my feet are normal sized (if not large)?... 7 and 1/2 to 7 to 6 and 1/2 (for kids)... of course if I chop my toes off like they did in China back then I'd probably lose the 1/2...

Actually, my feet look small compared to my brothers'. One has a 10 shoe size while the other has a 12 shoe size. >_<

I think the shoes I was wearing during homecoming just did a good job of shrinking my feet, that's all. :)

***

Contest :) Clue added to no. 20 :) )

Right now, Vinni-san's still leading :)

***

I fell up the stairs last Friday :( (And no, that's not a mistake. I really did fall "up" the stairs as opposed to "down". I fell on a higher step from whence I came. Only happens to me.) I now have a very unattractive bruise on my left leg, and it's all for nothing since we didn't succeed. >_<

Why oh why must we not succeed in walking out of Kom??? (Success Rate: 1 in 3 attempts. And we only got the one because we hid in the secret RH area for around 10 minutes.)

***

Please get well soon, my almost name-twin... (or is it name almost-twin? >_<)

***

I finished collecting the Pokemon Advanced Generation Happy Meal Set :) (Note: This is the one created for the release of Movie 8.)

I remember the old days in grade school when I tried to complete old sets... like the 101 Dalmatian set that I did not complete even after it was repeated (because of the live-action film) and the Snoopy set (with 28 different countries) that I did finish... and the old Hot Wheels cars and the little Barbie dolls...

I wonder how many Happy Meals I've bought in this lifetime so far... and how many I'll buy in my lifetime, whether it be for myself or for future spawn (LOL)...
rewritethepast: (determined)
In NSTP yesterday we were taught many things about infectious diseases.

Signs of a bird with avian flu:
Crown is purple.
Weak in general.
Nasal and beak discharge.
etc.

Also, a confirmation of leptospirosis. (Which is the disease you get from exposure to rat urine, which can be fatal if not treated.)

Also, we debunked the idea that looking into the eyes of a person with sore eyes will be equal to getting sore eyes.

We learned about the Father of Handwashing and the ancestor of Alcogel, chlorinated lime solution!

But best of all, we learned how to wash our hands properly! :) There are six simple steps to washing one's hand properly.

The six steps! )

These steps are important since we apparently miss a lot of areas using our normal ways of washing hands.

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Very scary. Yet at least we have found out.

Also, we were given freebies :) Some of us won special purple hand sanitizer (Ahem, Joan Joanne.). Everyone got a free bar of antibacterial soap. :) And we all got this nifty pin :)

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

***

Busted! )

***

It's been two weeks or so since I first got it, and now I don't know how I lived without it for so long. :)

I love white yellow pad!!! :) (aka Business Pad) Now I can use correction tape on yellow pad without being very very obvious :) :) As I loved yellow pad before (and wrote the infamous stories on it) now I will love and love and love my white yellow pad (and probably write more infamous stuff on it) :) :)

I should stock up on it now :) Sa Katipunan palang ako nakakita eh. :(

***

The dangers of having synesthesia, PE style. Also, the colors I see when I hear the song 'Sex Bomb'. Haha. )

***

Whatever the hell that thing was at the bottom of my last entry. )

***

Okay, Math question. (Since we just had our departmental exam on Tuesday.)

For any real number, k, w, x, and y, the statement w varies jointly as x and y means w = kxy. True or false?

***

Speaking of which, I wonder if we'll ever have a departmental exam in Math that starts on time. Twice, there has been delays. (We start at past 6:00 -at least- when we should have started at 5:30 pm.) The first was because of possible brownouts, seating arrangements, etc. while the second was due to room problems. We were told to go to our normal room, then we were told to move to this other room. We wait a long time for our teacher to appear. Then we were made to go away by the Behavioral Science teacher since it was their room, after all. Then we go to our original room, which is locked. >_< Then we go to the next room which is small, cramped, and has no aircon. So there is a shortage of armchairs, so people have to get them also.

Of course our teacher lamented the uselessness of his prepared seat plan instead of soothing our ruffled/smashed emotions. Interestingly enough, he still hasn't gotten the memo that David is in New Zealand and isn't going to claim his slot in Intarmed anytime soon. (Even though David-san has not attended any Math class ever.) >_< Donk.

It's unfair. The other classes were allowed to use calculators. We were the only ones not allowed to use them. Stupid biased piyok man teacher. (What a description.) I know we may be erm, considered highly intelligent, but it's unfair to deny us something granted to all the other Math 17 classes in UP Manila! *is bitter*

***

Philo class musings... )

***

Belated Happy Birthday Clar-san!!! :)

***

Hey, is everyone going to the Alumni Homecoming on September 2? I want to go! :) I hope I can go. O.o

Maybe I should start another contest (and give the prize out then, if the winner isn't out of the country - of course if you're from Intarmed, I can give it directly. If you're neither, I'll figure out a way. Haha.). LBC hates me. (Sorry Josef-san!!! I'll try again this weekend!) Would anyone join, though? Haha.

***

Obviously I am procrastinating from finishing homework for my very unit-heavy yet brain-numbing-in-more-ways-than-one subject.

I have a new theory about why Mr. Teacher's always late and sweaty, though.

***

If I ever say goodbye, let's hope I'm strong enough to not falter and run back and say 'Hello again.'
rewritethepast: (resignation)
LadyMed 2006 is over, under the carpet, closed, done, done.

Let me just say that my eyes and ears have both contributed to making me mentally scarred for life.

Even my synesthesia could not save me from the scary sights...

Imagine guys wearing bikini tops. >_< And they actually look like they have breasts (I mean... you know what I mean.)!!! >_< It was creepy because during the evening gown competition I saw one of the contestant's fake boobs. >_< Not to mention all the sexual innuendoes... and the gyrations of Fingerella with her surfboard!!! >_< I know I'm 18, I've watched Brokeback Mountain not to mention certain other films with such things but... gah.

Fingerella: All my life I've wanted to get inside a woman's body...

I am seriously wondering if we (Intarmed 2013) will be as insane/perverted as the other batches with a few years below the belt. Maybe UP Med Students = insanity + perversion + intelligence (haha).

I'm happy that our talent portion was really nice though :) The remix of the Beauty and the Beast theme song was cool. :) Although I guess ours was the least sexually suggestive of all of the talent samples... wala pa kaming alam diyan eh. O.o Hahahaha. Tsaka Belle (the character we have) isn't exactly a sex kitten. Then again, all of the Disney Princesses were not sex kittens per se(except Ariel, I guess, with her magical never-getting-destroyed shell bra and Jasmine with her belly-baring outfit but still) but after tonight...

I don't think I can watch Cinderella, Little Mermaid, Sleeping Beauty, and Aladdin without thinking perverse thoughts ever again. (Nooooo my childhood days!!!) Wala na. Mulan nalang ang papanoorin ko. Wait, crossdresser naman si Mulan. Nooooooooooooo.

Ok. Lion King na nga lang. (Noooo don't destroy that for meeeeee!!!!)

I'd like to share pictures, but I'm still waiting for someone to post them online.

It's really demoralizing when guys who dress up as girls look prettier than you, btw. :(

Well, I guess I have better hair? Demo, it doesn't count since they all wore wigs.

Ka-batch pala ng ate ko yung nanalo sa LadyMed. :) :) Ang galing nga naman niya sumayaw eh, parang en pointe na siya tapos nagfififth position pa siya pati almost grand jete at pas de deux (pero dalawa yung naglift sa kanya) :) :) Pero nakakatakot ang codename niya, Jenny Thalia. I repeat, med school looks like a long road to perversion.

At least it isn't a boring road :)

***

Life scares me when someone dances holding a sharp implement with the blade exposed.

I believe all those at a certain place at a certain time last week will agree with me on this.

From this alone it is assured that Intarmed life is going to be a series of heart attacks, day by day, week by week, and as the years fly by.

Ah well, at least it won't be boring.

***

Reflection on something. )

***

Who said coincidence doesn't exist? )

***

You're making me smile when I shouldn't be.

I should be scared of you, but you're too damn nice.

Thanks. :)

***

Tomorrow = Math Dept. Exam No. 2.

Please do not let me fail the honor of Pisay students everywhere (or everyone's expectations of us).

I've already failed it enough. :(

***

This is cheery. According to the program I got from watching "Walang Himala" (a play about Edsa 1 and what it has done for us) Sunday, this is my fortune (rather, kapalaran). (In fairness, may horoscope ang program.)

Aries:
Nung mapatalsik si Marcos, nagpabuntis ka sa boyfriend mo dahil tingin mo aayos ang Pilipinas. Nang mapatalsik si Erap, nagpabuntis ka uli sa boyfriend mo dahil akala mo aayos na ang Pilipinas. Ngayon galit mga anak mo sa iyo kasi bakit mo raw sila ipinganak gayong ang hirap ng buhay sa Pilipinas.

Is it even possible to be pregnant when you're not even conceived yet? (Since I was probably conceived in 1987, and Edsa was in 1986.) And I was only grade 6 when Erap was offed! >_<

I think I would have demanded marriage if I had gotten pregnant or something, though. O.o Or gotten married first. Haha.

The rest of the cheery stuff. )

I think Capricorn got the best fortune. At least they'll meet their true love. Then they'll kill each other. Still. Better than the rest. >_<

***

Here we go again, with all these leaves and flowers whirling around us. It's like first year all over again, except we're not under the yellow and pink flowered trees anymore.

And even if there's a whole lot of cement separating us, there's still a place where no one can stop our meeting, stop our looking at each other under the starry night sky.

At least we don't have to run from the Pisay goats anymore :) They did attack John Mar's plastic in first year. =P



Site Meter


rewritethepast: (hoe)
Take a guava from a guava tree. How? )

***

Because apparently a lot of us are reading erm, descriptive lit since it's required. >_<

Let's see the sample! )

***

I loved Tuesday's Math 17 class. :)

Wala kasing prof eh :) :)

***

I do not like crunches. My abdominal muscles kill me. And I cannot eat afterwards. Or laugh. Or anything.

***

The Fellowship of the School Supplies, Searching for the Clear Folders )

***

Everything seems less bad after a dreamless sleep.

Except STR (talks from experience).

And now, my Pisay-Intarmed classmates now torture me with old Research Manuals and stat-tests talk and give me even more nightmares of what was once my Monday-Double-Period-Good-Morning!

***

LadyMed practice is in full swing. (If you don't know, it's the competition between the College of Medicine batches wherein each batch dresses up a straight guy as a girl.) I am still disturbed by the sight of JF dancing with a guy. Anyway.

I am in the props division, which is headed by Athena. Since it's Athena who's heading it, you know the props are going to kick ass. :)

***

Ok, I knew this would eventually happen. But I blocked it out of my head hoping that it never would. But it did. )

***

Ok, I've been talking to the Pisay-Intarmed people who read my lj and some people thought (for a moment) that my lie was true. >_< And that it was believable, if they didn't see me every day in Intarmed.

I'm sorry. I'm happy here. Honest. I'm not regretting not taking up Chem Eng. I'm not regretting anything except the fact that I still miss him.

However, I'm going to set something straight. It's true that the guy I love said those bad things. "He" is not my conscience/inner voice. That's the ugly truth, that the guy I love can say (and did say) such ugly things to anyone.

And maybe that's more despicable than any lie I can make up.

***

I am not going to give in and say "I'm sorry." I'm not going to let you say "I told you so," because there's still no truth in what you said. I don't believe we have a chance, ever even had one.

But I am going to tell you something, darling, since I still can't say truthfully that I don't love you anymore.

I miss you. Although I know what you're going to tell me when you see me again.

"You regret it, don't you? Intarmed?"

Maybe I do. Maybe I don't. It's not your business to know now, with what you've done to me, my heart, my life.

Regardless, I'm not going to take anything I said above back.
rewritethepast: (determined)
As today is supposedly Livejournal Fake Day (or at least what's left of it, anyway) I shall make up a lie.

(And no, that's not the lie. But am I lying now? Brain sprain, darlings.) Let me call on the literal meaning of my username and say this: What if? (I repeat, this is just speculation. There are many lies in this work because of the nature of the date.)

And obviously, this is somewhat based on what happened here, here, and here. (Except those are 95%-100% true.)

Let the lies begin, and there we go. )

The truths and the lies in the story, enumerated to make it simple. )

Ahh. Now that that's out of my system, I need to go sleep. Or not.

(I think I suck at this lying thing, because there's still a lot of truth in it - at least the gut emotion in there, not to mention all those little insecurities that burn at you late in the night and make you wish for a sledgehammer. At least it was an attempt at lying. Think of this as writing practice, Raine.)

***

[This is written past 12:00 am, so no more lies. I'm just a lazy person when it comes to changing the time and date of my entries.]

Today, rather, yesterday was interesting. I have discovered that I like Cherry Marble from BTIC. :) And there's a promo, 2 scoops in a waffle cone for 60 pesos. (Pimp.)

Gbox is fun. :) Joan, Dingdong, CJ, Nil, and I played games there and racked up 235 tickets. We claimed 210 for a Sakura keychain. :) It's funny that the kiddie-ish version of basketball shooting gave out more tickets than the hardcore one. >_<

It is suspicious that one of my classmates ate at Sbarro's for lunch. Alone. At Sbarro's. And when he showed up for NatSci, he was wearing a pink shirt as opposed to his earlier white shirt (seen worn at Sbarro's).

Actually, something juicy happened but it is not my place to tell it. Let me just say it involves a wild-goose chase, a Neji keychain, a small pouch bag, and three tired people, one of which is me.

Actually, I'm just too tired now. >_< I'll talk about it on Sunday or later or something.

Telling lies is harder than I thought. Spinning them so that they seem a bit believable is harder. >_< I hope this doesn't happen again next year. (I'll just ignore whatever [profile] frankthecomic says.)

***

My KOM teacher wanted us to find GROs for his subject (and for whom, maybe?).

Good job, teach. O.o

***

There is this guy who claims to do scientific palm readings near the Supreme Court. He's sort of like an institution at UP Manila, supposedly.

Normally, when I pass by his erm, sidewalk space, he doesn't have a customer. This Monday and Tuesday his business was brisk (everytime I walked by, he had a customer - I pass his sidewalk space going to GAB, going to get lunch, going for afternoon classes, going home). On Thursday and Friday, he was gone all day. (He did leave his sign and chair though.)

Exactly how do you read a palm scientifically??? (Well, I've read that someone with soft palms is probably a lazy person - like me, I guess, but that can't be all of it.)

***

On Thursday morning, when I walked to GAB there was this little stream of blood on the sidewalk. (Ok, not little. Enough to be creepy.)

On Thursday afternoon, it was still there, and drying.

On Friday morning, it was still there and almost dry.

On Friday afternoon it was pretty much completely dry (and powdery).

I don't really want to know where/whom/what it came from. I know I heard something suspicious on Wednesday night but...

***

I really am tired and will now retreat and watch anime now. Or sleep. Or something.
rewritethepast: (hmm)
I thought that I'd escape seeing frat rumbles - or at least see less of them since there's less space there to actually have a frat rumble - since I chose to go to UP Manila.

They don't have rumbles at UP, they have it at Robinsons' Place Ermita. >.< When lots of Pisay people were off shopping for Cris' gift I went off to mail something via LBC and right in the middle of the mall, there was this rumble/chase/etc. happening. It was really disquieting especially since apparently they had come in from the other side of the mall.

Actually, I don't even think they were UP students. Why?

They had the typical high school male uniforms. >_< Maybe it's a frat at their high school...

No, they didn't actually land that much punches on each other. They just ran and ran and pulled clothes and stuff. Then the police came running after them and they ran off into the streets.

If I had gotten there around 2 minutes earlier I would have probably gotten hit by the running men, so I'm glad that I got there late for once. :)

[Edit: No, the guys are probably not from MaSci.]

***

Tests, tests, and soon to come tests... )

***

Too bad dropping a subject equals leaving Intarmed. )

***

I want to go to the Camia outing on Wednesday but I have classes then :(

***

Apparently I am not as introverted as I perceive myself to be.

However, I'm still more introverted than most everyone in Intarmed. >.<

***

This is the first time I've been blackmailed in my whole life. At least, as far back as I can remember. )

***

Again, sorry for the last entry if I offended anyone. Honestly, I believe that my verbosity only gets me into trouble. See first year, where my little piece about love in a dark classroom made me infamous - and known by a lot of people who probably shouldn't have known me for anything other than that.

***

(Sort of inspired by Kel's posting a word problem)

I was answering a problem in Math 17 in advance (since I was getting bored of how my teacher insists on adding say constant c to both sides when you can just transpose). I don't like Math as a rule (sorry Jman, Pauline, and Vinni =P), but I was amused by this question. I've never seen anything like it before. (Apparently neither has my seatmate fron Xavier, since he watched me solve it with amusement.)

The question plus the supposed solution )

***

Because I posted the aforementioned essay I wrote in first year, Trebor read it for the first time. Because of this, on Wednesday all the Pisay-Dil Intarmed people (except Joanne) decided to devote minutes to figuring out who he is based on my paltry clues.

Noooo it's doomed to be found out considering their intelligence!!! Especially Ardynne's intelligence!!! Doomed, I tell you, doomed!!!

And Trebor didn't like noticed my skirt that day. Actually he said "mataruch skirt mo!" and "mataray skirt mo!" Wearing boots with it didn't seem to help the image... (Trebor, Joan, etc. = gothy, "I am superior to you, don't dare talk to me.")

I should post pictures of said skirt, but I have no digicam. >_< Maybe when I wear it again in UP Manila... but I need a cameraperson...

[/edit] Trebor is not evil :) :) :) Bagay raw yung skirt ko sa akin :) :)

***

I don't know how I'm surviving without hearing your name from anyone's lips.

And when you get mentioned, it's all I can do to not badger the person with incessant questions.

Thing is, I just want to hear you speak again, and if I can't have that I want to hear about you.

But I can't ask without being obvious, so I'll just not ask at all and hope that you do something outrageous so that even we Pisay people here in Manila will gossip about it. :)
rewritethepast: (utterly happy)
In my last post, I listed several quotes from my previous lj entries. There was so much angst and happiness and anger and even confusion in one year of typing. It's funny, because all of those quotes seemed unrelated, haphazardly collected yet they make up something inexplicable, unique, and different.

And I'm really happy, since so many people posted and said they liked my writing (in the last entry). :) Getting compliments like these is a new experience for me. :) Really, thanks. :) You all made my day a lot happier. :)

After rereading all my entries I find myself wondering about how I got to this point in time, this place in the world (Intarmed, if you must). Honestly, if you asked me what I wanted to be in grade 7, I would have said that I wanted to be a computer engineer. (Hahahahaha dreams of a Lorraine who didn't know of the horrors of resistors.) Before that, I wanted to be a concert pianist. When I was even younger, I harbored a dream of becoming a ballerina - but then life came by and that was rendered impossible.

It's funny. I had a story published in the Science Scholar in first year. Jean and Inzo-sama both have saved copies of my story. I even autographed my English teacher's copy after she read it. >_< Leo even read it aloud when he got his copy of the newspaper. (Bad Leo. Bad. This was also during an experiment in IS.) I became known because of this story - people from other batches and even teachers approached me and asked who he was. My gosh, even Sir Villavert read it. >_< Every year, whenever I meet my new classmates for the first time, that story will come up and everyone will say who they think he is. Apparently it was very popular.

But I don't have a copy of it. I lost the newspaper where it was printed, lost the final draft, and I have no idea where the computer file is.

Eventually my friend gave me a copy but as we all know, too many things can happen to things written on paper (burning, disintegration, get flushed down the toilet). This is why I will now enshrine it here in my lj, where hopefully no coffee stains nor paper shredders will render it unreadable.

//Warning: I am not responsible for any barfing induced by reading this. I wrote this four years ago. Gawd, I was a sap back then. A verbose sap. It's interesting to see how much my writing style has evolved yet somehow stayed the same. And yes, I am such a passive person. Thank you.

The infamous story that haunted my whole Pisay stay... (with side comments) )

***

I'm an overly sensitive soul who wasn't so sensitive at one point in time and is now overly so to make up for it.

At least, this is what I told my Intarmed classmate as explanation for my apology.

***

I heard that there is now a carabao at Pisay :) :)

That's it, I want to visit. Soon. Asap. Something.

Not to mention I want to see if it's true that the squatter population living in front of Pisay has diminished greatly since we left.

***

I would like to be an activist but sadly I have a Philo test at the exact same time that I am called to be one.
rewritethepast: (sad)
You know, I have no idea what the new "Panunumpa sa Watawat" is. Zero. Zilch.

My ignorance of this was highlighted during the College of Medicine Flag Ceremony two days ago. Luckily, there were copies of it given to us. Still...

***

The Oblation statue here in UP Manila seems to be tilted. I'm wondering if the tilt is intentional or maybe we have our own manifestation of what's happening with the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

***

We used our knowledge of First Aid from Health to lift people during NSTP! ;)

"Hey, hey, are you ok?"

***

I have to read this Filipino short story for Kom 1. As of now, I've read it three times and all I understand is that there's a carabao in it. And the carabao's name is Paparo.

Forget my scientific calculator being my best friend, I've just exchanged it for the UP Diksyonaryong Filipino.

***

I'm starting to understand why Monch copied everything the teacher (and everyone else) said during 1st and 2nd year.

Sometimes copying what my teachers and uber-intelligent classmates say keeps me more focused on the lesson. This applies to everything but Math 17 since everything my teacher says is found in the book.

Not to mention the things that come out of their mouths are hilarious sometimes.

***

I've found the perfect role model for me here in UP Manila, and he's also in the Intarmed program. He's super-intelligent and well... ok, he's brilliant. Period.

Having Inzo-sama as my role model in Pisay played a big hand in my getting high honors. Let's see if it still works in this whole new environment, this business of having role models.

***

Apparently there are people who don't like Intarmed Batch 2013 (which is my batch).

Ah well. The fact that they're feeling such an emotion towards us, rather, wasting such an emotion on us when it could be channeled in a more positive manner...

It's their choice. I know it's been my choice to be mad at certain people in my life.

I just don't like it when other people from my batch get hurt.

***

I was walking down Pedro Gil with Dingdong and Joan when this lady gave me this flyer:

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Oh yes. I really need one of these. I mean, my hair may not be as healthy as I'd wish it to be, but it's definitely 100% straight.

*tonk*

***

Why do I always get paired with people who are happily taken/aren't looking/have questionable genders?

And no, I don't have a crush on the guys I hang out with a lot.

While there are a lot of brilliant guys (actually, all of them are brilliant in their own infuriatingly brilliant ways) here in UP Manila - Intarmed...

My silly heart can't forget a guy in Diliman.

Chikuso. I know it's wrong, but I still can't stop thinking about him. I can't stop dreaming of him. I can't stop caring about him.

I...

*I'm almost willing to spill the beans about who he is just for information about him nowadays. Maybe if I hear about him again and his many antics that just serve to highlight all his imperfections I'll stop feeling this.

Or maybe I'll be able to force myself to stop, at least.

[Note on *: This only works if I know you actually see him every day or even twice a week.]

***

And before I forget, happy birthday Pauline-san ;)
rewritethepast: (determined)
Hmmm. UP Manila considers me fit to enroll and fit to attend PE under certain conditions. Condition is to have PE with no streneous hip activity. I think I took the longest with the doctor since I had to explain why I marked the yes option on operations. So lalala, life story, four operations, yadda yadda. Doctor was pretty calm, though. At least he didn't ask me what all my doctors are asking me ever since I told them that I'm taking up intarmed:

1) The hospital walls are white. Very white. Can you take that? (I mean, I've spent at least two months bedridden - I know they're white, they're there, and so what. I'll be more disturbed if the white walls were splattered with blood. The walls being white are the least of my problems.)
2) Magiging surgeon ka ba? (Hell no. I'm sick of the profession. Just because I've been under the knife doesn't mean eventually I want to be holding that knife. Besides, there is a huge gender discrimination in that field, and I'm probably not the best specimen to try and overcome it.)

Hey, it's a step up from "not fit to attend PE." I'm just wondering what kind of PE I'll be doing. I mean, I'm not even allowed to play golf or bowling. What more if it's basketball? >_< (And no, I don't think UP Manila has scrabble.)

Hmmm. Forgot about this. UP Manila gives you the option to have rectal/abdominal/genital/breast exams. You can either take one, some, or none. Of course, I didn't take any. :) (Later my sister told me hardly anyone takes any of those exams. Oh yeah.) I think Joanne took one though.

***

I can't stop thinking about you.

I swear, the reason I'm not getting any sleep is because you keep popping up in my dreams.

And lately? You've always got a gun there. You don't shoot it at me.

Not that early in the dream though. You wait.

It's always the same. Wherever we are (and the location keeps changing - once it was the Camia room, the other time it was SM Southmall), it always starts and ends the same.

You walk up to me. You ask me to do something for you.

What's that?

Lorraine, paload nga. You hand me the gun and six bullets. The gun isn't empty. I have to take out the damaged bullets first, then I load the new ones.

You smile, you say thank you. (Rather, salamat.) I walk with you then, and we talk. It's always a different topic every night. One time it was Backstreet Boys, the other time it was the secret ending of Kingdom Hearts 2. Hell, last night it was the ending of the second season of Digimon.

And then we reach a door. The door is always white. You always say her name, then. I always shrug. I turn the doorknob.

Then, you shoot me (and you're not stingy, you use up all the danged bullets I loaded) and that's when I wake up.

Strangely, everytime I wake up I keep smelling blood. It's not the nice blood either, it's blood starting to congeal. Or maybe it's better known as the blood round slaughterhouses.

And no, I don't bite my lip when I sleep. Neither do my pimples pop, nor do I have nosebleeds.

I don't understand it, but I'm pretty sure what it means. (I did do a lot of research on dreams when I was younger, even read some volumes of Freud.)

You're not letting me off that easy.

This is going to be harder than I thought.

***

Sorry guys. Really, I don't know. I'm just drained. My mind is playing tricks on me. Too many things are happening at home. I'm sorry I didn't read your entries.

***

Quiz Result Provided By: theOtaku.com.



What Rurouni Kenshin Weapon Are You?


Hosted by theOtaku.com: Anime. Done right.


Gah. Typo. Can't edit it either.
rewritethepast: (resignation)
[Note: When I say I write dark things, I mean it. At least this time I didn't watch Pokemon before this. Oh wait, I did. Bah. Who said Pokemon couldn't inspire dark things?

Oh yeah. This is about 95% true. I lied about the color of her hair.

lj-cut because I didn't want to monopolize your friends page. It takes up 1/2 of mine as it is.]

Too bad I love you. Seventeen guys in our first year class and I chose you. You. )

The lyrics of the song... )

***

I've been hearing rumors about a certain person and his certain schools.

I hope they are definitely not true, because irony's a bitch if they are.

***

Yeesh. The Da Vinci Code is making my house a battlefield. My father likes it (and might believe it), my sister thinks it to be so-so, and my brother is too "unbiased" to comment as he reads it. My other brother thinks it's a good one-time read, but he's out of the country taking up a MBA at Berkeley, so he's no help.

I personally liked it as much as I did Holy Blood, Holy Grail, which isn't saying much. It did pass the time back in second year or so, though. I liked Angels and Demons more, actually. And Digital Fortress.

My father is getting hyped. I'm betting that I'll be in the theater May 19, watching the dang thing on the first day.

Jeesh. It's not like they're going to change the ending or anything.

***

Jhud-san and JMan-san = supermegaintelligentandbrilliantandallthoseotheradjectivesbecausethey'regeniuses. :)

***

Waaaaaahh kakapanood ko lang nung episode ni Charmander waaaaaah.

Talaga, nakakadepress yun. Waaaaah. Damian's such a bastard. Buti nalang matalino na rin si Charmander sa dulo. Pero kahit na. Waaaaaah.

And why, pray tell, did the dubbers call onigiri (riceballs, I guess) eclairs?????

0100: Yume

Apr. 26th, 2006 08:50 pm
rewritethepast: (Anna)
[Note: A darker look at what I started here.]

Blood. There is blood on my face. My hands, my hair, even my shoes are stained crimson. Her blood.

She is lying there, seemingly unconscious. Her long hair (oh how I have envied those golden locks of hers that could entrance even the hardest man) lies in disarray, stained crimson by blood. Her blood, not mine. That lithe body of hers, which taunts men in their dreams, is gone now, buried under the masses of bruises she now sustains. Only those eyes (ah those brown eyes like chocolate they say, but all my poetry's gone) are still alive now, asking a question I need not answer anymore. It was answered already with this, milady.

Wipe up the liquid before it dries, dearest; it would be a shame if your beloved saw you like this: bloodied, beaten, and broken.

By my hand, dearest, not anyone else.

"Why?" Plaintively, her voice carries over the noise, the beer party not a room away from us. "Why do this?"

Silly girl. Must I repeat myself? I tell her this, and tears fall down those lovely eyes, rolling down her blood-stained cheeks. Chikuso, even I am affected by those eyes.

"Why?" She is broken, her voice barely a whisper now. "You have everything. Why do this?" She is looking past me now, raising her head up for heaven to answer her. "You were so nice before."

It is different now, child. "I may have won the battle, dear, but you have won the war." I walk away now, leaving the blood to dry, the last flicker of life in those eyes of hers to fade away.

Why, you ask.

He loves you. Even with whatever I do with myself, with you, with the world, he loves you, the fool.

And I love him.


[Note the second: Yeeeouch. How the heck did this come by after watching Pokemon?]
rewritethepast: (meh)
I'm not sure, but I guess it's not good to marry third cousins, right? >_< Not to mention third cousins four years older than you. :)

***

I think I just signed away seven years of my life.

Let me accept it now, because I'm still unsure if I did the right thing.

***

Today we had this get-together for relatives (which is where I met my aforementioned third cousin).

My sister was thought to be 14 years old. She's 22 now.

I don't want to think of what my age would be to them. >_<

And some people think we're twins too. >_< She's four years older than me, man. C'mon. Not to mention I've got straight hair and she has wavy hair. And she's much prettier too. :( I think I'm taller by a little though.

Waaah. I apparently look like someone who hasn't gone through Confirmation yet - so I don't even look 12. Boooo.

Sheesh. How long will it be until I actually look old enough to get in an R-18 movie?

Probably a long time, since I'm still not allowed to enter R-13 movies apparently, thanks to the theater guards.

***

Will you take me away?

Yes.

***

Aha! I have somehow acquired the infamous Pokemon episode which gave lots of Japanese children seizures. >_< Now I'm scared of watching it. Donk.

Oh yeah, the first Japanese theme song of Pokemon may actually be worse than the English one. (Yes, it's possible.)

***

Ne, just a question for you readers:

Do you really think I'm in love? Rather, do you really think that I love him?

References would be here, here, here, here, and here. Or probably all my entries tagged "love".

***

Your EQ is
180

50 or less: Thanks for answering honestly. Now get yourself a shrink, quick!
51-70: When it comes to understanding human emotions, you'd have better luck understanding Chinese.
71-90: You've got more emotional intelligence than the average frat boy. Barely.
91-110: You're average. It's easy to predict how you'll react to things. But anyone could have guessed that.
111-130: You usually have it going on emotionally, but roadblocks tend to land you on your butt.
131-150: You are remarkable when it comes to relating with others. Only the biggest losers get under your skin.
150+: Two possibilities - you've either out "Dr. Phil-ed" Dr. Phil... or you're a dirty liar.



I resent the Chinese remark. I understand some Chinese, as long as it's not of the Cantonese variant (Fookien and Mandarin I'm ok with). Although the remark is not applicable to me, I guess. Still.
rewritethepast: (Anna)
It's been four years now. Four years of watching, of waiting, of seeing you as you once were and now are, of growing up amidst the numerous problems that beset us all back then, from buying a recorder to rejected STR proposals.

Four years I've watched you and you know what?

I can't seem to stop.

I don't know why I can't. We've never been close. We've always been like those ships that go past each other in the night, never noticing each other as we sail by, except that I do notice, and I'm the only one who does.

If I had one wish, it would be to forget this.

What is "this?" It's the denseness you possess, the impenetrable skull you possess that keeps you from understanding me. It's the way you walk past me every school day and not notice the blush that suffuses across my cheeks as you pass by. It's the way one smile from you makes my day so much better even if I've just failed a long test. It's the measuring glance you give me when you catch me making a fool of myself.

Plain and simple, I guess, I want to forget about you. Yes, you heard me right. I want to forget about you.

I want to forget you.

Other people would notice if they had such an effect on anyone. My friends have noticed that I'm only a combination of happy-miserable when you're around, although they haven't really cornered me about it yet. (Thanks guys, you know I love you.) Even the classmates I never wish I had from long before I met you noticed how much I've changed because of you, of this silly immature love that won't die even after almost four years of living. Even my teachers, even the ones I suspect are half-blind, see it. Why can't you?

Oh yes. You're dense. Pour the ice cubes down the back of your clothes and I bet you still wouldn't wake up from your mid-afternoon nap. Turn off the computer monitor and you'll still be staring at it, never minding its sudden blankness.

Wake up, get out of bed, try and take a shower. I doubt it'll make you smell better than you usually do, but at least it's an attempt. Not that your smell drives me away, because love means having a cold when the person you love stinks.

I'm tired. I'm so tired of everything that once was. I'm even more tired of everything that now is.

Most of all, I'm tired of everything that will never be.

But I can't blame you. After all, after all these years you're still the boy-man I fell in love with back in English in first year - tall, slightly pale, and the boy who slept in English class. It's not you who changed, but me. I'm the one who grew up from back then, taking off those rose-tinted glasses and blooming in my own awkward way, trying to make something change between us, trying to make you look at me differently from what you saw back then.

In the end, even if I wish I had never met you, I still am happy to have seen you again and again these past years. Why?

You still remind me, day by day, of the reasons why I fell in love with you.

So let me close my eyes, let me see you as you were back then and as you are right now, because even if they take everything else away from me they cannot take my dreams of you away.

January 2008

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