rewritethepast: (resignation)
Okay, according to my mom who talked to someone in the registrar's office, all the transcripts for the Pisay people in UP Manila were sent out Thursday morning. So it should be received by UP Manila on Monday by the latest :) So probably all the UP campuses who don't have the Pisay people's transcripts should be getting them soon. :)

I don't know why it took so long though. Haven't heard of a reason yet.

***

What was I doing on the day of September 11, 2001?

I remember going to school. I remember going home. I remember taking off my shoes and socks. I remember using the internet, still dressed in my green skirt and white blouse. I remember being called for dinner.

I remember watching CNN and going to sleep afterwards, trying to block it out of my head.

I remember the next day in class, we listened to the radio during Araling Panlipunan (which is SocSci, I guess). I remember that black radio, broadcasting things that spoke of sadness and destruction and everything else in between. I remember the colors diminishing that day, mixing and mixing and having a sheen of palest gray.

I remember being sad around that time. I didn't really understand all the political arguments that raged on at that time but I felt so sad because of all the lives lost and all the people shouting and everything being so...

I remember feeling numb.

I remember wanting to close my eyes to the world and its cruelties.

I remember being sad because I had seen the World Trade Center the summer before my Grade 6 year and I realized I would never see it again exactly as it once was.

I remember not wanting to go on an airplane for a long while after that.

I'm sorry, I'm blabbing, but I just watched the movie and I feel sad and sadder and it's like I'm that Grade 6 girl over again.

***

I'm glad to hear you guys did well selling Cello's doughnuts, Josef-san :)

And congratulations to all the University and College Scholars :)

***

And even though I always complain about the Harry Potter movies and all the things they changed and dropped...

I'm going to go look for that trailer on the net (for OoTP) once it comes out :)

Speaking of movies, I want to watch Happy Feet :) I've seen the movie trailer a lot and I want to know what the movie is all about :) Besides dancing penguins are always good :)

***

It's hard to be sad when everyone else is sad. I keep trying to think of ways of how to cheer people up, make the load on their backs a little lighter. But all my ideas are gone, blown away in the wind, only fragments of them left fluttering and falling into my hair.

I try to find the right words to say but once I'm there, all my prose disappears.

Please guys, take care, ok?

Everybody wants to be understood
Well I can hear you...
Everybody wants to be loved
Don't give up
Because you are loved (you are loved)


You are loved (you are loved)
Don't give up (don't give up)
It's just the weight of the world!! (you are loved)
Don't give up (don't give up)
Everyone needs to be heard (don't give up)
You are loved (you are loved)

- Josh Groban, You Are Loved (Don't Give Up)
rewritethepast: (resignation)
The Pros and Cons of Wearing Something other than Sandals and Sneakers )

***

There isn't a swear word invented that can fully express my ultimate hate for Math 17. )

***

Maybe I just don't want them to end up like me. )

***

I promised I’d post the erm, reason for my leaving early (Homecoming), or actually, what the hell I did instead of watch my classmates and teacher win UNILAB prizes, but Math et al. has eaten my brain again. (Actually it’s been shut down without warning too many times this week; ctrl + alt + del doesn’t work anymore. My brain needs a reformat. Badly.) Maybe next entry. Besides, it deserves an entry of its own.

***

Lots of us are feeling poorly due to our Math test and the environmental/physical/mental/emotional factors involved in taking it. Get well Joanne, Cybill, Poch (haha, talaga ba may sakit ka?), etc. (Oo nga no, puro pala Block 13 ang natamaan.) Yeesh. We need a break from Math 17. (Actually we need a break from Mr. Math.)

I mean, I’m not the sharpest crayon in the box when it comes to Math but this was a hard test. I swear, guys, the tests here in Manila are harder. This test, I think, is a sure fail for me. As in cinco o quatro fail. And if our Intarmed Math God and Goddess are unsure of their performance in the test (and I’m sure a lot of people know who they are, have known them for a while even), then what more of us mere mortals? (And I don’t think I’m a mortal anymore, I’m just a erm… degenerate species? Hahahahaha.)

Bah. Stupid long questions. And Mr. Math cannot multiply. If he ruled the world, 1 times 1 would be equal to 2. Donk.

I am anticipating the day of evaluation of Mr. Math with sadistic glee. If it happens tomorrow…

***

Contest, ended :) )

***

Titilated yet? Yeah right. )

***

I’m seeing someone I shouldn’t be seeing here. I thought it was a fluke the first time, a coincidence the second, but I was shell-shocked at the third as now I know his supposed course here (since he was with his blockmates and I know that block’s course).

Talk about those coincidences that you wish would never happen to you.

I’m still praying it’s a mistake. Please make it a mistake.

Gaaaaaaaaaah. More stress.

***

Wake me up
when September ends...

- Wake Me Up When September Ends, Green Day

Then again, if September ends, finals will follow in October. Wala bang pass hanggang November? >_<

***

And to all you Katipunan people out there, we might just see you really soon :)
rewritethepast: (poor grundo)
[Edited thanks to Marga-san :) Thanks!]

I've talked about my dismal relationship (if you could even call it that) with my STR groupmate with a different zodiac sign than mine (yes, my other groupmate and I have the same zodiac sign) a lot here. I'm surprised that so many people have read about it (some people I didn't even think knew me...). See here, here, here, here, here, here, and here for more excruciating details, passably worded.

But you know what? It's all useless.

Because he doesn't read it. Because he's such a bastard that he's wrapped up in his own goldfish bowl world that he doesn't even notice all the shit he puts me through. Because in his eyes I'm just Lorraine Miss Mary Sunshine, friend of all and person you can make do anything, even if it's basic crock.

Yeah. That's life. It sucks.

[And I can't even throw the links into his face because he's apparently going through some emotional turmoil right now. Damn my conscience for not wanting him to be more depressed than normal.

Even if he deserves it. Even if he deserves to get all that shit he threw at me back double.

This is why I don't like myself.]

****

Wow. Friday was woah. (Okay, I've lost all my pretty words.)

Okay. So there was that Inter-Scholastic thing, right?

So I met my old classmates from Zobel. People I never expected to see again. People from the past I never wanted to remember.

We talked. (Him and him and him and me and Sam and Ces and Ogot and even Monzon for a brief instant.) Inane stuff, like how's school, who's the teacher with you, what we learned in Math 5, etc.

Well, they got eliminated, so they left early. So we waved goodbye and all that.

You know something?

I thought I hated those people. Hated them point blank and all.

Now I realize it isn't that simple. I had fun. It was bizarre to see them again, in an environment I love and think of as my second home. It was even more bizarre to talk and laugh with them, after the hell I went through in grade school.

I guess I've become a little kinder ever since I came here.

Or maybe the wounds have started to heal, one by one, ever since I came here to Pisay. Ever since my Ruby years, Zobel has gotten further and further away, until it is but a distant memory, a nightmare that was my former life.

I guess this is part of growing up, huh?

***
Being in the Director's List is like, woah. )
***

Wala lang. Kwento lang sa sinauna kong buhay.

I had a stalker in grade school. Ces and Sam know who he is, but I guess no one else does. He was my classmate in grade 7, but he started stalking me in grade 6. We had a bizarre relationship, to put it lightly (is it customary to be teased about your stalker? Or to be forced to sit next to him?). Ka-batch ko siya. Ka-club ko siya ng dalawang taon. (Computer Club kaming dalawa. Presidente ako for two years. Oo na, geek kaming dalawa.)

Wala lang. Top 2% rin siya. Tapos pareho pa kurso namin sa Ateneo. ME ata. Talk about bizarre coincidences.

Pero wala siya sa kainan. So baka di siya pupuntang Ateneo. Hahahaha. Nag-alala pa ako.

***

Oo nga no. May La Salle Star Scholar Orientation sa 14th. We got this key that we're supposed to bring to the orientation. >_< Made in China siya. Wow. It's supposed to unlock our potential. >_< Sana house and lot nalang. :)
rewritethepast: (Default)
[Note: This is not about him. This is about someone else from my old school. That's De La Salle Zobel, if you didn't know.]

"When tomorrow comes again, things will go, 5-6-7,
Rollin' in various directions as they always have..."
-Cream, Ghost in the Shell

It's silly. Really, I thought that chapter was all done and closed when I left that school.

I guess it was all wishful thinking on my part.

I saw him again. I saw him in first year, in second year, and now again when I'm fourth year, how many months away from graduating. Always in one place, that Powerbooks store that's the closest to where I live, at ATC.

He still looks the same. Tall, dark, and... well, you know the rest. He was still himself, and I was the girl I was back then all over again, meeting him once more in the school mass when he sat next to me. (Our school tried to decrease talking during mass by having girls be seated next to boys from other sections. Not that it worked.) Back then, there was only silence between us. Now, there always will be.

It's stupid. It's infantile. But I can't help but feel sad about it.

He was my first real crush after all, the one I thought about in grade school while learning all the progressive tenses and memorizing all the bones in the skeletal system. He was the one you said you had a crush on during sleepovers, the one people tease you about whenever you recite in class.

He wasn't even my classmate then. (We were never classmates. Never could be, with his grades compared to mine.) We never really talked back then, except on the internet. (We talked about silly things too, like our mutual dislike of graduation ceremonies and his brief stint with politics.) I never even knew he existed as himself back then, only becoming aware of his presence when he sat next to me in the school mass one day in grade 6.

Baka. There was never anything between us, and there never will be. (We were never truly friends, after all. Close acquaintances, maybe, but never friends.) Never mind all the dreams there were of him, made up of all the things that went into Sweet Valley books. Never mind the teasing my classmates gave me whenever I defended him from his political detractors.

There was just me, him, and an insurmountable bridge between us. I was too smart for him, they said, and he was too popular for me to enter his world.

In the end, he never really knew me, did he?

It's silly, but when I saw him again that day in Powerbooks something broke in me when he didn't even know who I was anymore. (I looked at him, he looked at me, and he walked by. It was never like that before, but time goes by, I guess.)

Tell me I'm stupid, but I guess that's part of being a teenager. I guess this really is goodbye then to that life I lived before.

Let that door be shut now, and let it stay shut. That's what the new year is all about, anyway, forgetting all the bad stuff from before and moving on.
rewritethepast: (neopet petpet)
Yesterday I killed 54 ants that were crawling all over my desk and distracting me from my Math homework. With rubbing alcohol. By drowning them in the liquid. And I watched them struggle for their lives, all 54 of them, and I couldn't keep myself from feeling happy.

Ah well. At least I didn't have a spray gun like I did as a child, hitting ants as they climbed up walls.

***

There are disturbing unknown insects in the dorm room. They must die in this fumigation. Thank you. One looks like a cross between a cockroach and a fly. It is hard to kill with anything other than a slipper.

***

Pinoy board game = done. Even though our materials got lost somewhere on the campus, and there was that Reader's Theater thing, it's done and in Ma'am's cubicle. Thank god. Alvin-san almost gave me a heart attack when he said that Ma'am didn't have our game yet but actually it was the Tuwaang game she didn't have yet.

I'm glad we actually thought of a game for that epic with the pointless battles. And it's a cool game since it's got elements inspired by Diablo, D & D, etc.

I miss D & D.

***

No CAT = good.

***

And for everyone who asked me about the last entry:
I feel much better now, thanks. Though it's not as bad as what you think. Really, I think the last entry was a tad ambiguous. Thanks, guys. And no, it did not involve physical rape.

January 2008

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