rewritethepast: (resignation)
Have you ever woken up, thinking there was no point to waking up? That waking up would just make you face everything you've run away from, all those things you wish just didn't exist?

I've been waking up and thinking that for a long while now.

Regardless, even if I'm scandalously late (and my phone is missing yet again, hiding beneath my bed for unknown reasons!), Meri Kurisumasu, Maligayang Pasko, Merry Christmas. :)

***

This Christmas I received seven bags. :) I like bags.

But of course Christmas means something else, which is the mutilation of my French first first name. Gah. You know it's bad when it's the relative you see the most that massacres your name beyond recognition (only one r, i before a, etc.) and the relatives you forgot you had spell your name perfectly.

Eighteen Christmases have shown me one thing: no matter how easy it is supposedly to pronounce one's name (on record, only one person has mispronounced my first first name, and that's my English teacher in 2nd year), it is only too easy to misspell it.

Still, it was an interesting Christmas. Thanks to everyone that texted me :) I would have texted but my phone is still hiding under the bed. >_<

***

My family decided to eat at Makati Shang for Christmas dinner.

Hee, who should be at a nearby table but Zsa Zsa Padilla and Dolphy. I didn't recognize any of the other people they were with though.

That takes care of my Celebrity Sighting quota for the year. :)

***

Hey Block 13, you know that book we're supposed to read for Humanidades 1? "Ang Daigdig ng Tao?"

Its author just passed away a few days ago this year. :(

***

It's never been an option to admit I love you, you know.

Believe me, I've tried. I've tried and tried and looked for all the opportunities to do so, even making plans for them when they wouldn't come into my life.

It's first year all over again and I'm answering a long test in Integrated Science, scribbling down answers on a piece of intermediate pad paper rapidly since I studied hard and know all the answers. I write and write and suddenly you stand up and submit your paper and all the names and scientific information in my mind disappears in an instant and my heart beats faster and nothing is left but my thinking about you, you, and only you and soon the bell rings and my paper's only half finished and I leave the classroom in a daze.

All those years and I wait, wait and wait, and still nothing comes to pass. Then it's all gone wrong and it's you and me under one of those large trees and it's your voice I remember from that night, your firm voice telling me it's all just a game, a game and my heart cracks and it's all lost and you turn away like a gentleman does so I can cry without being shamed, with only the tree and the rain as my witnesses. Yet you're still there, just a foot away, and I want to speak but my voice has gone raspy and tears are the only thing I can express coherently.

It's all a game for you.

I wish you'd realize it never was.

Maybe, maybe everything now is because of you. Maybe my insomnia, my nonexistent attention span, my pale face and wish to run away from everything is because of this uncertainty that has always surrounded us, cloaked us and made what could be into what never was.

And now I sleep and sleep, hoping never to wake up, never to see the sunlight filter into my room past the venetian blinds. Let me stay in my dreams, Sandman, don't bring me back into this waking world. Please. Because I know what will be the thought in my mind when I wake up, when I wipe the tears from my eyes and touch my damp pillow and bring it out to dry.

I'll never be able to say it now.

***

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.

I can't wait. :)

Wow, the series I started reading in grade 5 is about to get finished soon. I think I'm going to feel what I felt when I finished Book 13 of Series of Unfortunate Events, only on a much larger scale because HP... for some days, it was all I had to think about positively.

***

It's apparently illegal and immoral to sell one's kidney.

According to the Department of Health, at least.

***

The Letter Meme, where Jar-san gave me the letter O. Gah. )

Okay, this was hard. Gaah.

***

Why is it that relatives never get clothes sizes right? You gain weight or maintain it and they give you stuff that won't fit a toddler. You lose weight and they give you stuff that'd fit a sumo wrestler. >_<

***

My brother wants to buy a Magic Sing. Help!






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rewritethepast: (resignation)
I haven't posted in a week. >_< I've sunk to new lows. Still now, I'm not finished with a lot of things I need to do. Ah well. I've been thinking too much again. I wish that I could turn off my brain sometimes. But with my luck, I'd probably just forget to turn it on again. >_<

Note: Different people were involved in all parts of the story. Well, actually the people in the first two parts are the same, but they are different distinct people compared to those in the third and fourth part.

Intro: This is a true story, yet some details are omitted or made unclear for the safety of certain people, most of all me. :) This story is more understandable if you've actually been reading my lj for at least eight months (basically, while I was in Pisay). (Haha, that's long.) Still, I tried to make it reference-free for those who aren't used to my writing style yet.

And you know, I'm still not done with you, Homecoming. There's still another story to write, which will probably appear after my 3rd Departmental Exam in Math on Thursday. :)

An Alumni Homecoming Story in Four Parts )

Note (added September 12, 2006): Obviously the person referred to in Parts 1 and 2 is not the same as the person referred to in Parts 3 and 4. Or if they are, I think I may have written a mistake in somewhere. *donk* I believe the person's identity in Parts 3 and 4 is obvious due to a number of key statements. However, it's the person's identity in Parts 1 and 2 that's the same as number 51 in my second contest :)

***

I'm glad I saw Jhud-san and Jar-san at Homecoming :) Although I was shocked by their physical appearance at first. Arvin-san also looks different. Ok, a lot of guys basically got hairier. >_< (As compared to Intarmed males who visit the barber at least once a month?) Still nice to see known people other than those in Intarmed again that are in my age range. :)

I'm glad I got to see a lot of people, although most of them were Lithium. (This was inevitable because apparently they were all attracted - by some sort of chemical/magnetic bond- to the Lithium Intarmed people.) I'm glad I got to see my anime-loving buddies too :)

Hmmm. I got accused of having footbinding done on my feet a lot that night (the lily feet). O.o I know I'm Chinese, but we're not that traditional... And I think my feet are normal sized (if not large)?... 7 and 1/2 to 7 to 6 and 1/2 (for kids)... of course if I chop my toes off like they did in China back then I'd probably lose the 1/2...

Actually, my feet look small compared to my brothers'. One has a 10 shoe size while the other has a 12 shoe size. >_<

I think the shoes I was wearing during homecoming just did a good job of shrinking my feet, that's all. :)

***

Contest :) Clue added to no. 20 :) )

Right now, Vinni-san's still leading :)

***

I fell up the stairs last Friday :( (And no, that's not a mistake. I really did fall "up" the stairs as opposed to "down". I fell on a higher step from whence I came. Only happens to me.) I now have a very unattractive bruise on my left leg, and it's all for nothing since we didn't succeed. >_<

Why oh why must we not succeed in walking out of Kom??? (Success Rate: 1 in 3 attempts. And we only got the one because we hid in the secret RH area for around 10 minutes.)

***

Please get well soon, my almost name-twin... (or is it name almost-twin? >_<)

***

I finished collecting the Pokemon Advanced Generation Happy Meal Set :) (Note: This is the one created for the release of Movie 8.)

I remember the old days in grade school when I tried to complete old sets... like the 101 Dalmatian set that I did not complete even after it was repeated (because of the live-action film) and the Snoopy set (with 28 different countries) that I did finish... and the old Hot Wheels cars and the little Barbie dolls...

I wonder how many Happy Meals I've bought in this lifetime so far... and how many I'll buy in my lifetime, whether it be for myself or for future spawn (LOL)...
rewritethepast: (Default)
It's done.

I've graduated.

And I only have this blank piece of paper with a yellow ribbon tied around it to show for it.

Well, and a medal. :) That is virtually indistinguishable from the medals Marlon-san, Isay-san, and Jman-san got.

Hahahaha.

I wonder when we'll actually get our "real" diplomas. Or if the diplomas we got are legal and valid and can be shown to the college of our choice. Or if we should just write on the blank paper and voila, our diplomas! >_<

***

It's over.

I still don't feel like it's over.

Maybe because of STR.

Or all the other things I still need to do.

Like writeups.

Gaaah.

***

Mr. General asked my dad where he was from while we were on stage.

My dad said that he was from Jolo, Sulu.

Mr. General said "Sulu? Anong pangalan mo ulit?"

Father told him, and then he told the lady with him that.

Thankfully we left soon. (Thank God for Choops-san being after me.) I was scared about what he might ask next.

Gaaah.

***

Still. It's over.

This is the last time I'll ever get to wear the Pisay uniform as a fourth year student.

I don't know what to feel.

***

Anyway, congrats Batch '06! :) We've made it :)

I'll miss you all.

But this isn't goodbye, as Isay-san said. It's just goodbye until we meet again.

Guys, this is real. What we had was real.

We're not about to just let it fade away, are we?

Batch '06 = love.
rewritethepast: (gakuen alice)
Wow, may results na pala ang La Salle. Sort of. >_< Inemail na sa akin ang results ng mga kabatch ko sa Zobel dati. >_< Tama yan, pero di ko alam kung pasok naman ako. Gah.

May bagong trophy ako sa KOL! >_< (Oo na, huli talaga ako diba?) Dahil nagpatay ako ng sampung reindeer! >_< Buti nalang mapera pala ang pagpatay sa kanila...

Ngayon ko lang nakita na may email pala ang aming dakilang STR teacher sa amin. (Panira naman kasi, 1980 new messages ba naman every day... kelan ba mauubos yan...) 'Yaw ko na... more hidden requirements that I guess I'll end up doing since my groupmates are indisposed (wherever they are)... there goes the last doomed despair despair despair days of my vacation... And how will I finish my Palancas now?

Later I have to attend a party for my 80+ years old grandmother (in red, since it's the Chinese side of the family). My cousins want to go out and "gimmik" after the eating. >_< Around twenty to thirty of us kids (of different ages, no less. I have cousins who are in grade 3 and those working already for Microsoft. >_< ) in red walking around Glorietta together... eek. Baka isipin kulto kami. Pero di black suot namin, red. Haha. Tapos PBA player pa naman ang isang cousin ko (na naglaro para sa Ateneo sa UAAP nung last panalo nila). Baka malagay kami sa news! >_< "Coca-Cola Tigers player sighted with Red Cult!" Eek. At least tama naman ang kulay namin sa team niya hahaha

Serious entry later... (hopefully)
rewritethepast: (neopet petpet)
Naruto dating sims = evil.

My eyes. They burn.

Damn you evil dating sim maker.

***

Eep. Too many things to do this break.

STR data gathering
English reading
STR revisions
Physics Problem Set
Paskorus(?)
Math: Eureka
AdProg
Health report
Econ SW (aka HW)
Filipino reading (for LT)
Chem studying(?)
CAT (fixing the attendance stuff, records)

Of course, I haven't started on anything. (Except the data gathering.)

I have a feeling I've forgotten something. Gah, I'm dead.

I'll start tomorrow.

Famous last words.

***

My family, is as always, unstable.

I can't wait to get away from this life.

***

Potassium.

How can I say it?

Oct 31 and Nov 1 (part of it) was love.

Thanks.

Nico-san + pisay schoolgirl outfit = love.

Well, Don-kun too.

Andoki-san. :)

Vinni-san + SA outfit + veryveryevilicecreamversion!ballandcuptoy = love.

Didn't get cotton candy because of the huge line. >_<

I now know what we were supposed to do in Fatal Frame. Gah.

I can't believe we (Nico-san, Katya-san, Albert-san, and I) all fell asleep during White Noise.

Sixth Sense = aww.

Codfish pie?

***

I'll take a break from the clues, the entries wherein he dominates for a while.

Let's just say something happened last night.
rewritethepast: (neopet petpet)
I guess the first thing I write here is that I got poisoned by naphtalene. Barfed eleven times because I smelled it.

Yay. More stuff for my allergies list. Never again. Almost missed Physics + Econ perio because of it. Even Ma'am Yazon was worried about me for a while. She said that I wasn't smiling much.

Haha. I guess it's good that the director is worried about me. Yay.

*******

My roommate and I got driven crazy last weekend (yes, the weekend when we were supposed to be studying for perio) trying to remember how "Papercut" by Linkin Park was sung. Hahaha. Then we asked people and they didn't know either. Hahaha. I asked Don-kun when we did STR Sunday but I didn't hear him that well since the spectrophotometer hated us for a while. Wednesday I found my old album and played it until my cd player died.

Shoot. I don't want to remember the times I went through when I listened to that.

*******

Someone told me Friday to go to Seniors' Night. Then he didn't come. Damn.

His loss. I think. I think he ended up playing DOTA though. Drat.

*******

I learned a lot of things during Seniors' Night.

I learned that a lot of people want their handwriting analyzed.

I learned that Sir Vlad is insane. ^_^

I learned that I know what Julia-san's smile looks like. (Too bad I couldn't join the contest. Can't indian-sit.)

I learned that my family situation sucks compared to other people.

Ah well.
More on the night I slept in Gluon zone )

***

So he said hi. And I said hi.

Is this the start of a beautiful friendship? More like he probably wondered why my face turned deathly pale when I saw him.

Damn my naphtalene allergies. And damn his smelling like it right when I saw him.

Shoot, I wonder what he thought of that.

I can't believe he didn't know I was a dormer. Shoot.

***

For some reason, this amuses me.

Guess that Friend

***
I made a color bar!! I suck at photoshop, but I was able to make one! ^_^


Ruby Camia Potassium Graviton Pisay sections is love.


Now if I could only make one for each section... ^_^;

***

Intrams this week. I think I'll just hide under the pillows and watch Advent Children again and again until I have to return it to Wilson-san. Hahaha. I'd probably get hit by a volleyball again, just like in all the other intrams I've reluctantly attended.
rewritethepast: (Anna)
Kahit 07 ang sinasabing nanalo, 06 the best parin sa cheerdancing! :) Pinaguusapan nga namin nina Furqaan-san na siguro sa gym na ang prom natin dahil naubos na ng 07 ang pera nila sa cheerdancing costumes nila at yung balloons. >_< May mga moves sa cheer ng 06 na nasa presentation namin (Graviton) sa Pinoy... >_<

***

Wow, kilala pala ng kuya ko si Dr. Moreno. (Note: this is the brother who's Batch '96.) Amazing. My brother apparently got tutored by him in the dorm (!!!) in Physics. Rather, my brother used to barge into Dr. Moreno's room and say "Sir, paano gawin 'to?" Considering that my brother ended up becoming president of the Physics Honor Society and Top 5 of the batch, I guess Sir Moreno really is a good teacher. :)

***

In the end, I didn't fail anything. Yay. :) Never mind the people who kept telling me that "Apat lang ang walang bagsak sa Grav. At wala ka dun.".

Note to self: Do not believe the rumors floating around Graviton. Rather, only believe the rumors you hear from Bea-san. :) She told me I didn't fail anything and apparently I didn't.

***

Damn. I have to find my copy of Don Quixote. I know we had it around here somewhere...

***

DL dapat ako kung walang STR. Damn.

***

I am now officially addicted to Tactics Ogre: The Knight of Lodis. Damn. This is as bad as when I was playing the original Ogre Battle on the Playstation. Or Star Ocean 2. Or Chrono Trigger on the SNES. Or Suikoden (the first). Or Pokemon Blue in 5th grade (haha).

This is all Wilson-san's fault. I started playing because he told me to. Damn.

At least I'm level 14 now, instead of the paltry level 5 I was last week.

***

CAT = evil. I had to go around checking the classes for people who had incomplete uniform/were cutting CAT/had no uniform at all/were excused (lucky people). The only good thing was that I didn't have to clean up the area. >_<

Kiel (while checking Gluon for those with incomplete uniform): "John Mar, zipper!" I really did not need to see that. Thank you.

***

He's still himself. He's intelligent, but clueless. That's all there is to it, and I have to take him as he is. Because everything that he is...

And even if the world turns against me, it'll still be all right, because he is there, and for me that is enough...
rewritethepast: (Anna)
To everyone else: Good luck sa UPCAT. Ganbatte! ^_^

***

Drunk at 3:48 pm in the afternoon. Self, you are absolutely pathetic.

Thank you, self. Thank you very much. Thank god I still have a few hours to sober up before UPCAT. And at least I can type correctly even while drunk.

Econ Perio ate my brain. The triple E's in Math Perio fried me. And English... who gives a damn as to who was the hundred-eye watchman?

Obviously, I'll fail something this quarter. And it's got Econ written all over it.

Although STR is a not so distant contender...

I can't get energized about anything. I keep thinking of STR, of UPCAT, of tomorrow being the single most important day in my high school life as it will determine my near future...

And I sleep. I goddamn sleep.

I miss my brother too much. I don't think I was fun at all at the Pota party because all I could think of was my brother, and how I'll never see him again for the next years to come. I know that he needs to get an MBA and all, but I miss him.

It's stupid, and it won't explain my drunkeness to my parents, who'll probably skin me alive for doing so.

But I'm the black sheep in the family, and I guess it'll always stay that way right? After all, it's their fault why I'm Rh-negative, like 15% of the world. >_<

And he broke my heart yesterday. And the day before. And all the days before that.

No wonder I couldn't comphrehend anything in Econ.

***

If I wasn't sure that I was in love with him, I'm definitely sure now.

Because even if he defames me, or tells me I'm stupid, or laughs at me I still love him. Even if I see him do drugs or skip class or other hardcore things that I've done that I hope no one else will be as stupid as me to do, I still love him. Even if he tells me that I suck at Physics I'd still give up everything in my life for him.

What's the point of life anymore?

Damn you, third year. Why'd I have to fall in love then?

January 2008

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